{"id":950,"date":"2025-08-06T10:45:08","date_gmt":"2025-08-06T10:45:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/?p=950"},"modified":"2025-08-06T10:45:08","modified_gmt":"2025-08-06T10:45:08","slug":"a-doctor-and-an-engineer-entered-a-chocolate-store","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/?p=950","title":{"rendered":"A doctor and an engineer entered a chocolate store"},"content":{"rendered":"

A doctor and an engineer entered a chocolate store.<\/h2>\n

As they were busy looking around, the doctor stole 3 chocolate bars.<\/p>\n

As they left the store, the doctor said to engineer, \u201cMan! I\u2019m the best thief ever, I stole 3 chocolate bars and no one saw me. You can\u2019t beat that.\u201d<\/p>\n

The engineer replied, \u201cOkay, you wanna see something better? Let\u2019s go back to the store and I\u2019ll show you real stealing.\u201d<\/p>\n

So they both went up to the counter and the engineer said to the shop boy, \u201cHey, would you like to see some magic?\u201d<\/p>\n

The shop boy replied, \u201cYes!\u201d<\/p>\n

The engineer said, \u201cGive me one chocolate bar.\u201d The shop boy gave him one, and he ate it\u2026 He asked for the second, and he ate that one as well. He asked for the third, and finished that one too.<\/p>\n

The shop boy asked, \u201cOkay, what are you trying to pull here? Where\u2019s the magic?\u201d<\/p>\n

The engineer replied,\u00a0\u201cCheck in my friend\u2019s pocket. You\u2019ll find all three bars.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

This 89 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting.<\/h2>\n

When she went before the judge in Cincinnati he asked her, \u201cWhat did you steal?\u201d<\/p>\n

She replied,\u00a0\u201cA can of peaches.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

The judge asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry.<\/p>\n

Then the judge asked her how many peaches were in the can.<\/p>\n

She replied 6.<\/p>\n

The judge said, \u201cThen I will give you 6 days in jail.\u201d<\/p>\n

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman\u2019s husband spoke up and asked, the judge if he could say something on his wifes behalf.<\/p>\n

The judge said, \u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n

The husband said,\u00a0\u201cShe also stole a can of peas.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

After a meeting several days ago, I couldn\u2019t find my keys. I quickly gave myself a personal \u201cTSA Pat Down.\u201d<\/h2>\n

They weren\u2019t in my pockets. Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My husband has scolded me many times for leaving my keys in the car\u2019s ignition. He\u2019s afraid that the car could be stolen. As I looked around the parking lot, I realized he was right. The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.<\/p>\n

Then I made the most difficult call of all to my husband: \u201cI left my keys in the car and it\u2019s been stolen.\u201d<\/p>\n

There was a moment of silence. I thought the call had been disconnected, but then I heard his voice. \u201cAre you kidding me?\u201d he barked, \u201cI dropped you off!\u201d<\/p>\n

Now it was my turn to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, \u201cWell, can you come and get me?\u201d<\/p>\n

He retorted,\u00a0\u201cI will, as soon as I convince this cop that I didn\u2019t steal your car!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Welcome to the golden years\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A doctor and an engineer entered a chocolate store. As they were busy looking around, the doctor stole 3 chocolate bars. As they left the store, the doctor said to engineer, \u201cMan! I\u2019m the best thief ever, I stole 3 chocolate bars and no one saw me. You can\u2019t beat that.\u201d The engineer replied, \u201cOkay, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":889,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-950","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/950","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=950"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/950\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":951,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/950\/revisions\/951"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/889"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=950"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=950"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=950"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}