{"id":1117,"date":"2025-08-13T12:04:51","date_gmt":"2025-08-13T12:04:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/?p=1117"},"modified":"2025-08-13T12:04:51","modified_gmt":"2025-08-13T12:04:51","slug":"nose-picking-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/?p=1117","title":{"rendered":"Nose Picking."},"content":{"rendered":"

As Joe was trying to pack for vacation, his 3-year-old daughter was having a great time playing on the bed.<\/h2>\n

At one point, she said, \u201cDaddy, look at this,\u201d and stuck out two of her fingers.<\/p>\n

Trying to keep her entertained, he reached out and stuck her fingers in his mouth and said, \u201cDaddy\u2019s gonna eat your fingers!\u201d pretending to eat them before he rushed out of the room again.<\/p>\n

When Joe returned, his daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face and tears streaming down her face\u2026<\/p>\n

Joe said, \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong honey?\u201d<\/p>\n

Dejected, sad and broken, she looked up at him and said,\u00a0\u201cDaddy, where\u2019s my booger?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning.<\/h2>\n

After a few quiet hours out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him. He looked up at his dad and asked \u201cHow do fish breath under water?\u201d<\/p>\n

His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, \u201cI really don\u2019t know, son.\u201d<\/p>\n

The boy sat quietly from another moment, then turned back to his dad and asked, \u201cHow does our boat float on the water?\u201d<\/p>\n

Once again his dad replied, \u201cDon\u2019t know, son.\u201d<\/p>\n

Pondering his thoughts again, a short while later, the boy asks \u201cWhy is the sky blue?\u201d<\/p>\n

Again, his dad replied. \u201cDon\u2019t know, son.\u201d<\/p>\n

The inquisitive boy, worried he was annoying his father, asks this time \u201cDad, do you mind that I\u2019m asking you all of these questions?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course not son.\u201d replied his dad,\u00a0\u201cHow else are you ever going to learn anything?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.<\/h2>\n

\u201cWell son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDad you don\u00b4t mea-\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes I do. You\u2019ve earned it.\u201d Says the father as he passes a copy of \u20181001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition\u2019 to the son.<\/p>\n

\u201cDad I dont know what to say\u2026I\u2019m honored.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHi honored,\u201d Replies the father. \u201cI\u2019m dad.\u201d<\/p>\n

My daughter hates school.<\/h2>\n

One weekend, she cried and fretted and tried every excuse not to go back on Monday.<\/p>\n

Sunday morning on the way home from brunch, the crying and whining built to a crescendo.<\/p>\n

At the end of my rope, I finally stopped the car and explained, \u201cHoney, it\u2019s a law. If you don\u2019t go to school, they\u2019ll put daddy in jail.\u201d<\/p>\n

She looked at me, thought for a moment, then asked,\u00a0\u201cHow long would you have to stay?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As Joe was trying to pack for vacation, his 3-year-old daughter was having a great time playing on the bed. At one point, she said, \u201cDaddy, look at this,\u201d and stuck out two of her fingers. Trying to keep her entertained, he reached out and stuck her fingers in his mouth and said, \u201cDaddy\u2019s gonna […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":889,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1117","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1117","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1117"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1117\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1118,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1117\/revisions\/1118"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/889"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1117"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1117"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tappyli.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1117"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}